Brokenness.

   How is it already the end of January?! My apologies for not posting in the last few weeks: work is beginning to get busy thanks to the upcoming tax season, I had very little break during the holidays from my four classes so I was catching up with them, plus I had midterms for a few of the classes last week, my mom had minor surgery on her hand, etc., etc., etc.. You all know how crazy life can get just when you think it can't get any busier. Anyway... 

   I wanted to share a thought that I had a few weeks ago. Scars are not pretty, but scars are a part of your story. Physical or emotional, visible or hidden, they are there. We all have them, but what we choose to do with them is up to us. They can remind us of how terrible things were and how broken we felt, but they can also show God's incredible love, mercy, and grace for bringing you through.

   Mandisa is one of my favorite Christian artists, and her album 'Overcomer' has become a huge blessing recently as I have been listening to it again. Her song "What Scars Are For" actually triggered the above thought in my head. Hearing the song and actually paying attention to the words are two different things and I actually listened to the words recently... Whoa. The chorus is below.

"They remind me of Your faithfulness

And all You brought me through.

They teach me that my brokenness

Is something You can use.

They show me where I’ve been and

That I’m not there any more,

That’s what scars, that’s what scars are for."

   That chorus hit me like a train at full speed: being so broken that there is no where else to run to, no one else to turn to but God. Wow. Psalm 51:14-17 says this:

"Deliver me from the guilt of bloodshed, O God,

The God of my salvation,

And my tongue shall sing aloud of Your righteousness.

O Lord, open my lips,

And my mouth shall show forth Your praise.

For You do not desire sacrifice, or else I would give it;

You do not delight in burnt offering.

The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit,

A broken and a contrite heart—

These, O God, You will not despise."

   Not only do we feel broken, but we feel guilty and empty. What can I offer God when I have nothing in me? There is nothing left for my family, my friends, myself, so what could I possibly give to Him? Here's the thing. He wants your brokenness. He wants the emptiness of your soul. He wants you when you have nothing left to give. We question why anyone would want us when we are like that but it's what God does. He takes those shattered pieces of our lives and begins to mold them into something that He can use to show His faithfulness and grace. 

   Hopefully, my point was made, but if not, here it is in a nutshell: God wants the broken bits of you to bring glory to His name. Remember that when you have nothing, He is everything. 

~ Abby